My Roommate Wants a Free Maid Service and a Personal Chef

My roommate couldn't cook, but she still wanted to eat home-cooked meals. So, she taped a meal request notice right on my door.

[Hey, roommate!]

[I'm super busy with work, and I don't have time to cook, not that I know how to, anyway. I've been living on takeout for over half a month, and my stomach can't take it anymore. Your cooking looks amazing, so I was wondering if I could have some too.]

At first, I felt a little bad for her. I mean, sharing a meal now and then wouldn't be a big deal. But then I kept reading, and my jaw practically hit the floor.